I'm Going to Need a Second Opinion

For those of you who are faithful readers or better yet privileged enough to speak to me on a regular basis; you know that for the past 6 months I have been in quite the tire dilemma with my car. It started off with new tires and then new bushings and a new control arm. After a small fortune and many meltdowns on my behalf; I still had a clunking, shaking right front tire. I considered retaliation to the company responsible for making my shaking tire worse each time I visited their store (and each time they swiped my Visa). I was even willing to let someone bulldoze my car over and tell the insurance company I woke up to my car flattened by a bulldozer…strangest thing. Don’t worry, I won’t be going to jail for insurance fraud or public threats but you may see me in TIME magazine for most determined Honda owner of the year. After many months of pure frustration and anger over the mystery to my tire (and when my steering wheel started driving itself); I did what anyone who was choosing to obey the law would do. I went to three different tire auto body shops and asked them to look at my tires. One place told me my car was in perfect alignment. Laughing out loud in the man’s face I said, “Drive it down the road and if you don’t veer to the right at any time; keep driving because the car is yours.” As he handed me back my keys after his test drive, I took his silence as an apology. Tire store number two told me my best option to realign my car was to replace my brake pads (because new tires can cause a tread imbalance if brake pads aren’t also new) and take apart my steering column to make sure my new control arm wasn’t causing the problem. Basically, the man could have said, “I have no idea what is wrong but if you go along with me, I will have successfully suckered you into buying new brake pads and charged you for hours worth of labor to tell you that your control arm looks fine.” And tire store number three told me, “Ma’am, you need new front struts. You can’t properly align a car when the struts are bad.” Finally, I had my answer (and a knowledgeable, honest mechanic). After calling around to find the cheapest place to buy struts (have I mentioned I am a relentlessly determined individual); I handed over my Honda to be fixed and finally put an end to my tire madness saga.

My determination to put an end to my tire that was chipping away at my sanity each time I started my car was driven mostly by the level of danger I felt I was putting myself in daily. (My level of anger/frustration was a very close second) But what drives my determination in Christ? What drives you? Do I possess the same willpower when it comes to Christ as I do with life issues? When God is leading me down a path with unknown answers and multiple failed attempts on my behalf, I don’t always keep the same determination. I turn to others for answers. I eat massive amounts of ice cream for comfort. I put God in a box and doubt His abilities. I allow Satan to chip away at my faith which ultimately destroys my determination. When my determination in Christ starts to diminish, I begin to rely more on the world and less on Him. The truth is: I am a fighter. (I didn’t earn the name GI by being a whimp) And I will endure much more than most especially for the ones I love. Because I am a fighter, my drive in Christ never disappears but it does take a temporary leave of absence once in awhile. I love Christ more than anyone so it is only natural that I fight the most for Him but during my “leave of absence”; I am driven by my will instead of His will. I am determined to find a four-wheeler path along His road that will get me to where I want to go. I am determined to find a loop hole in His plans that will make my ideas seem much wiser than His ideas. I am determined that God won’t mind an occasional panic attack opposed to prayer, or an extra day of anger opposed to joy, or an extra helping of bitterness opposed to forgiveness, or most importantly; a second opinion from Jay Garcia opposed to a second opinion from Jesus Christ. By choosing my will over God’s will; I have failed many, many times. But I have also learned that my determination to keep fighting is greatest in Him. I fight harder in my walk with Christ because I know that it is the only fight worth every ounce of my willpower. I fight harder because I know that I finally have my answer: an honest and knowledgeable creator. I have handed over my life and allowed Him to put an end to my madness saga.

 Verse to remember:  Isaiah 59: 13-15 ¹³ rebellion and treachery against the LORD,
 turning our backs on our God, inciting revolt and oppression,  uttering lies our  hearts have conceived. ¹⁴ So justice is driven back, and righteousness stands at a distance; truth has stumbled in the streets, honesty cannot enter. ¹⁵ Truth is nowhere to be found, and whoever shuns evil becomes a prey.