For over a week, I have only been wearing a contact in my right eye. When I attempt to put in my left contact (my most seeing impaired eye) I feel as if I am inserting hydrochloric acid opposed to my contact. Along with instant pain and burning my eye becomes red and irritated. I have concluded that I either have an eye infection or I have scratched some part of my eye. A smart person would go to the eye doctor and put a stop to this pain and blindness but I choose to go around with only one good eye. And if this isn’t bad enough, every morning when I get out of the shower I still attempt to put in my left contact expecting a different outcome only to regret this decision a few seconds later. Tonight I was driving home, in the rain,(for those who had the privilege to ride with me in the pre-contact time period, you know that I am especially blind when it’s dark and raining) and when I came to a stop light I noticed the car beside me staring at me. At first, I thought they were watching me jam out to K-LOVE and then I realized that there were probably wondering why I was sitting inches away from the steering wheel. As I was laughing at my adaptive driving technique, I put on my glasses to ensure my safety as I continued driving home.
I have been using my contacts for months so I didn’t appreciate the severity of my astigmatism until this week when I was going around half blind. Not only was my vision bad in my left eye but I was putting more strain on my right eye because it was working twice as hard. I neglected my eyes and my need for contacts and as a result I have suffered headaches, blurry vision, and a red swollen eye for days. My ability to neglect my vision had a very similar result to when I neglect God’s vision. When I face each day, I must choose to seek God first and allow him to guide every part of who I am. Not only does this require obedience but it requires an unwavering faith. If I allow fear to overtake my faith when I am faced with a difficult situation, a seemingly impossible task, or complete brokenness, I will become blind. I will become blind because my fear will override the presence of God and I will become blind because I will start relying on my own vision instead of God’s vision. Whether we are in the valley or on the mountaintop, we must allow God to lead us. It’s impossible to allow God to guide our lives if we don’t surrender everything to him. What areas of your life and you unwilling to turn over to God? What personal vision in your life is more valuable than God’s vision for your life? Are you walking around with one good eye only seeing and therefore experiencing half of what God has for you?
Without my contacts, I add more strain to my eyes and am forced to compensate numerous time throughout my day in order to see clearly. My physical “blindness” takes away my ability to see road signs, class notes, and football score on the TV, leading to frustration and voids in my days. Without God, I add more strain to my life and rely on my own guidance, leading to a downward spiral of compensations in order to see clearly. My spiritual “blindness” takes away my ability to trust God in all situations and makes it impossible for God’s vision for my life to unfold. Don’t compensate God’s vision for your life and don’t trust your own guidance over His. When/IF you do you will always be limited to blurry vision because no matter how hard we try, without God, we will always be blind.
Verse to remember: Isaiah 56:10-11 10 Israel’s watchmen are blind, they all lack knowledge: they are all mute dogs, they cannot bark, they lie around and dream, they love to sleep. 12 They are dogs with mighty appetites; they never have enough. They are shepherds who lack understanding; they all turn to their own way, each seeks his own gain.
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